


Misguided Angel

by 4thofFive



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 17:37:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2820590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/4thofFive/pseuds/4thofFive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>How they met. Why they need each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Misguided Angel

**Author's Note:**

> Title and section headings from the song Misguided Angel by the Cowboy Junkies. Written by Margo Timmins and Michael Edward Timmins.
> 
> This has long been one of my favourite songs but recently I realized a couple of the lines describe Steve and Danny perfectly. This story is the result.
> 
> Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everyone.

**Though he's wild and he's bad and sometimes just plain mad, I need him to keep me satisfied**

 

Growing up I’d always had this image of what my life would be like. Being a police officer was the first thing I could visualize most clearly. I always knew it was what I would do, what I was meant to do. But as I got older, other images came into my mind – a wife and children, a house with a white picket fence, a dog and a car. Simple dreams. Nothing special. Nothing fanciful.

 

For a while I had all of that – not the white picket fence but a nice house where I mowed the lawn in the summer and shoveled snow in the winter. I still remember waking up some mornings and looking around in wonder at what my life had become. Rachel would be sleeping softly beside me and sometime in the night Grace would have snuggled between us and our dog would be lying across my legs. I remember my heart filling and my eyes stinging when I thought “this is it. This is my dream. This is all I ever wanted.”

 

Then it all fell apart as dreams often do. Rachel got tired of being married to a cop and found a rich, successful property developer instead. I moved into a crappy motel blocks from my old home and saw my baby on weekends. Then, minutes after the divorce papers were signed (or so it seemed), Rachel and Grace were winging their way to Hawaii and I had no choice but to follow them.

 

Those first six months in Hawaii were the worst of my life. I can’t remember a time when I was so lonely. Only the 10 or so days a month I got to see my baby girl gave me any hope to carry on. I was a haole, an outsider who wore leather loafers and a tie. I was not welcome in HPD and that fact was made clear to me on a daily basis. On my days off when I didn’t have Grace, I usually worked out at the local gym, wandered around the neighbourhood, or sat in my living room having a beer and watching whatever sporting event was on TV. Let me tell you, Cricket is pretty fucking boring to watch.

 

Then _he_ showed up at my crime scene. Steven Fucking McGarrett. An arrogant asshole with no fear of death and a twisted belief in his own infallibility. God how I hated him when I first met him. I was certain he was going to get me killed and he wouldn’t have had one moment of concern if he did. The best thing I did in those first couple of days was punch him right on his smug face.

 

But after a while I started to realize that his arrogance was born of being highly trained and highly skilled. He knew exactly what he could do and he did it very well. Even more surprising was realizing that he wasn’t intent on getting me killed. Instead he was intent on keeping me alive, in protecting me if I needed it but more importantly, trusting me to do my job well. I've never admitted this to him – his head is big enough – but when I realized he trusted me implicitly, when one of the best Navy SEAL’s ever to come out of Coronado had complete faith in me to watch his back, I was just…I don’t really know how to express the pride I felt.

 

And then over time I came to not only respect him but to like him as well. I enjoyed spending time with him on his beach after work or arguing with him in the car. As time went on and through all the trials and tragedies we shared, I came to love him too. First like a brother and then not like a brother but…something else. Something that scared the shit out of me.

 

I actually remember the day it happened. We’d been…well I don’t want to rehash the terrible fuck up of that day but suffice to say that because Steve and Five-0 were involved, there was a great deal of gun play and a rather large explosion. I was outside when the explosion hit and I remember a moment of sheer, blinding terror when I didn’t know where Steve was. I thought for a second he was dead and I knew in that instant some large part of me would die if he did.

 

Then I turned around and saw Commander McCrazy himself strolling towards me, a shit-eating grin on his face. He was covered in little cuts and had about an inch of ash and debris coating his body.  And his tac vest was actually smoking from the burning embers that had fallen on it. He looked ridiculous and so alive and I remember staring at him and realizing that, aside from my baby, I had never seen anything so beautiful in my life. I actually stopped breathing for a second.

 

I don’t recall any conscious thought going through my mind at that point. I didn’t have any plan or idea. I just went on instinct and in that moment instinct told me to kiss him, so I did. I kissed him hard and long. I pressed myself up against him and buried both hands in his filthy, disheveled hair. He froze for a heartbeat and then wrapped his arms around me and kissed me back and I knew, for the first time since my life with Rachel had imploded, that this is it. This is my dream. This is all I ever wanted.

 

 

**Well, it's in the way he walks, it's in the way he talks. His smile, his anger and his kisses**

 

OK, I’m going to be honest here. The first time I laid eyes on Danny Williams I thought he was ridiculous. I mean, my god, who walks around Hawaii wearing loafers and a necktie? And that hair. That slicked back style made him look like a character from The Outsiders (which he later admitted to me he was going for).  If I hadn’t known from his record that Danny was a great cop with an amazing homicide solve rate, I would never have come knocking on his apartment door and taken him on as my partner.

 

The first few weeks working with Danny were umm, challenging to say the least. He was loud and opinionated and constantly bitching me out for everything I did. There were times I wanted to kill him and hide the body where no one would find it. But then he’d talk on the phone to Grace and his voice would soften and he would smile, and I knew that under all that bluff and bluster beat the heart of a good man – even if I still wanted to strangle him with his own necktie.

 

I’m not sure exactly when I came to realize that he had become necessary in my life. I think it was the evening I came home alone after a kidnapping case. All day I’d been with Danny and in between car chases and gun battles, he’d been loud and demanding and yapping so endlessly that when I opened the front door of my dark, empty house, the silence hit me like a ton of bricks. Most people probably would have breathed out a sigh of relief at this point, grateful for some time alone.  But I didn’t feel that way. I couldn’t because so much of my life had been dark and quiet and I’d never realized it until that night when the light and sound of Danny was gone and I was alone again.

 

It scared me, feeling that way. Knowing that I needed Danny. Knowing that he’d become so much a part of my life and my joy in life that I couldn’t bear the thought of being without him. But just coming to that realization doesn’t mean I accepted it easily. In fact I fought against it. I fought the desire to be with him, to want him. I fought against what I saw as my weakness in needing another person. For so much of my life, after my mother died, I’d been on my own, making my own way and determined not to become dependent on anyone. I had goals for my life and I wasn’t going to let something as messy and complicated as love hold me back, and I didn’t. Until Danny. Until I finally realized that fighting against needing Danny in my life is like fighting against the tide.

 

At first I thought I just loved Danny as a best friend, as the brother I never had. I loved being with him. I loved laughing with him and I loved arguing with him. No matter how much time we spent together I wanted more of it and I especially wanted more of Danny and Grace. Even when I started to realize my feelings were maybe deeper than I’d imagined I didn’t allow myself to indulge in them.

 

You see I’d convinced myself that my feelings for him were not reciprocated. He’d been married to a woman and had a baby after all. He was pretty obviously straight and his time with Gabby and with Amber had proven that. But it was ok, I’d decided. Maybe I couldn’t make a family with Danny and Grace but I would do everything I could to keep them in my life. If friendship and brotherhood was all Danny could give me then that’s all I would ask for, and I would be grateful to have it.

 

Then came the day of the failed drug bust and the explosion at the warehouse and suddenly Danny was kissing me and I was kissing him back. I don’t even remember if we spoke any words at that moment but I do remember the first taste of his lips on mine and I knew without a doubt, without a doubt, that there would be no more darkness and no more loneliness and that I had finally found my life.

 

**Misguided angel love you till I’m dead**

 

Steve and Danny turned back to the Judge who chuckled and shook his head lightly.

 

“Well, those are the most unique marriage vows I’ve ever heard but somehow, knowing the two of you, I’m not surprised.”

 

The judge dropped his head for a moment to suppress a grin. He knew when Steve and Danny asked him to officiate at their wedding it would be like nothing he’d ever experienced before and he had been right. He took a deep breath and forced a semi-serious look to his face before looking up at the two grooms again.

 

“Now, let’s get on with the official part of the ceremony shall we? Steven John McGarrett do you take this man…”

 

The end.

 

 


End file.
